Posted: November 4th, 2015

Managerial Communication

Managerial Communication

Revise these sentences to state their meaning in fewer words. Avoid passive voice,

needless repetition, and wordy phrases and clauses. The first sentence has been

done as an example.

1. Many local farmers plan to attend next Friday’s meeting.

2. Although Bradley Hall is regularly populated by students, close study of the

building as a structure is seldom undertaken by them.

3. He dropped out of school on account of the fact that it was necessary for him

to help support his family.

4. It is expected that the new schedule will be announced by the bus company

within the next few days.

5. There are many ways in which a student who is interested in meeting foreign

students may come to know one.

6. It is very unusual to find someone who has never told a deliberate lie on

purpose.

7. Trouble is caused when people disobey rules that have been established for the

safety of all.

8. A campus rally was attended by more than a thousand students. Five students

were arrested by campus police for disorderly conduct, while several others are

charged by campus administrators with organizing a public meeting without being

issued a permit to do so.

9. The subjects that are considered most important by students are those that have

been shown to be useful to them after graduation.

10. In the not too distant future, college freshmen must all become aware of the

fact that there is a need for them to make contact with an academic adviser

concerning the matter of a major.

11. In our company there are wide-open opportunities for professional growth with

a company that enjoys an enviable record for stability in the dynamic atmosphere

of aerospace technology.

12. Some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it;

there are many opinions on this subject.

Exercise : Eliminating Wordiness Exercise 2

Directions: Combine each sentence group into one concise sentence.

1. The cliff dropped to reefs seventy-five feet below. The reefs below the steep

cliff were barely visible through the fog.

2. Their car is gassed up. It is ready for the long drive. The drive will take all

night.

3. Sometimes Stan went running with Blanche. She was a good athlete. She was on

the track team at school.

4. Taylor brought some candy back from Europe. It wasn’t shaped like American

candy. The candy tasted kind of strange to him.

5. Government leaders like to mention the creation of new jobs. They claim that

these new jobs indicate a strong economy. They don’t mention that low-wage jobs

without benefits and security have replaced many good jobs.

Exercise : Eliminating Wordiness Exercise 3

Revise the following passage, avoiding wordiness and undesirable repetition.

A large number of people enjoy reading murder mysteries regularly. As a rule,

these people are not themselves murderers, nor would these people really ever

enjoy seeing someone commit an actual murder, nor would most of them actually

enjoy trying to solve an actual murder. They probably enjoy reading murder

mysteries because of this reason: they have found a way to escape from the

monotonous, boring routine of dull everyday existence.

To such people the murder mystery is realistic fantasy. It is realistic because

the people in the murder mystery are as a general rule believable as people. They

are not just made up pasteboard figures. It is also realistic because the

character who is the hero, the character who solves the murder mystery, solves it

not usually by trial and error and haphazard methods but by exercising a high

degree of logic and reason. It is absolutely and totally essential that people who

enjoy murder mysteries have an admiration for the human faculty of logic.

But murder mysteries are also fantasies. The people who read such books of fiction

play a game. It is a game in which they suspend certain human emotions. One of

these human emotions that they suspend is pity. If the reader stops to feel pity

and sympathy for each and every victim that is killed or if the reader stops to

feel terrible horror that such a thing could happen in our world of today, that

person will never enjoy reading murder mysteries. The devoted reader of murder

mysteries keeps uppermost in mind at all times the goal of arriving through logic

and observation at the final solution to the mystery offered in the book. It is a

game with life and death. Whodunits hopefully help the reader to hide from the

hideous horrors of actual life and death in the real world.

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